Describing the intensity of my love for you is like trying to describe the color red to one blind from birth. What can I say, what can I do, what words can I use to make you see how much I really love you. Should I talk about the hours and the days I’m obsessed with the thought of you? Longing for a mere glimpse of you, to play over and over again in my head like an Instagram video looping endlessly. Or should I try to describe what I would do to you right now if you were here, lying next to me?
I want you.
I want you forever, now, yesterday, and always, but above all, I want you to want me.
No matter where I am or what I am doing, I am not safe from your spell. Every time I hear from you, your love potion fills my soul with delight. At any moment, the image of your face smiling at me, of your voice telling me you care, or of your hand in mine, may suddenly fill my consciousness rudely pushing out all else. I spend my time thinking only of you. I cannot think of another.
Everything reminds me of you. I try to read, but four times on a single page some word begins the lightning chain of associations that summons my mind away from my work, and I must struggle to return my attention to the task at hand. Often I give up easily, leaving my computer, and throwing myself down on my bed, wishing I could whisper sweet nothings in your ear, while my imagination constructs long and involved and plausible reasons to believe that you love me too.
Yes, I have a crush on you. I am obsessed with you, I am addicted to the hope of reciprocation. I have faith in you, I believe in you, will you make love to me ever again? Say it. Say anything. Something to make me whole again. Something to brighten one more day for me.
You have seen the light and the light burns bright, why hide it under a basket? Shine your light on me and cleanse my soul with your love. Take me to the place where they turn water to wine, to our secret place of pure ecstasy. Can you hear me now? Can you see me now? Shine bright my love, shine your bright light on me.